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When is the right time to get married?

Life & Style

When is the right time to get married?

Bebe Cool was introduced to his wife Zuena’s parents but is yet to tie knot

My students ambushed me with an obvious yet tricky question; when is the right age to get marriage? I realized that I had to buy more time pondering over the question before giving them an answer.

The truth is, there are definitely plenty of signs that can help you along with your decision.

 Are you a hundred percent sure that you trust the person you want to marry? You should know that even through the worst of times, your spouse will be there for you, and that you can grow together.   It is also important to finish school first. The truth is, as a new family you will need money in order to survive. Education is the best tool to build the financial foundation for your marriage and a healthy lifestyle.

Before you get married think about where you and your spouse will go if you get married. Are you ready to move in with him or her?  Sometimes you need to do a cost-benefit analysis of the situation. Will waiting to get married be more financially savvy? Will getting married now help improve your finances? Have you discussed financial issues with your partner? It is important for a solid union to know what to expect from the other.

You should be in a position to demonstrate your ability to live independently before you think that it is time to get married. It’s even better to have lived independently (as individuals) before thinking of getting married. Getting married should be a matter of making life commitments – not a means of making ends meet.

Are your families okay with it?  Will they be involved in your joint lives? How does your family feel about your partner? Consider how much you value the opinions of your family and assess the situation. Experience has it that when marriages start developing cracks the most immediate people to intervene are the family members. Therefore they must be involved from the start.

Is there true love for each other?  Money shouldn’t be the reason if you guys aren’t as lucky as others build up together. That’s real love. It’s about being supportive for each other. Make sure you love one another and you are ready to go through all situations together.

Sometimes it is necessary for the two of you to be friends.  I don’t mean that you two have to be friend s first and then start love.  In fact, this leads to a lot of awful friendships where the girl thinks she has a good male friend and the guy thinks he is grooming a lover. That friendship is never genuine because they both have very different ideas about what’s going on.

You should be lovers as well as friends. I have realized that every successful relationship has this point at their core: If you take out the romantic connection, those two people would still hang out like nothing had changed.  The friendship element should prevail.



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