Bebe Cool’s Playlist Power Claims Anger Ziza Bafana

 In news that has sent ripples of bewildered amusement through the Ugandan music scene, self-proclaimed “Big Size” artist Bebe Cool has reportedly announced his ascension to the throne of radio and television playlists. Sources confirm that the legendary musician has openly boasted about his uncanny ability to single-handedly dictate which tunes grace the nation’s airwaves, leaving many artists, particularly dancehall sensation Ziza Bafana, scratching their heads – and perhaps checking their blocked call lists.

Ziza Bafana, known for his energetic performances and, apparently, a sensitive heart, expressed profound dismay at Bebe Cool’s pronouncements. “Heartbreaking,” he reportedly muttered while polishing his latest gold chain. “Non-exemplary,” he added, presumably while contemplating the existential dread of his latest banger being relegated to the dusty corners of forgotten MP3 players.

Bebe Cool’s revelation of his alleged media manipulation powers has been met with a mixture of awe and suspicion. Insiders whisper of clandestine meetings in dimly lit studios, where Bebe Cool, with a flick of his wrist and a well-placed phone call, can either catapult a track to national stardom or banish it to the digital wasteland. Some speculate that his influence even extends to controlling the jingles played during commercial breaks, ensuring a constant sonic landscape curated by the “Big Size” himself.

The implications for the Ugandan music industry are, shall we say, interesting. Upcoming artists are now reportedly lining up outside Bebe Cool’s residence, clutching demo CDs and offering everything from free studio time to lifetime supplies of gonja in a desperate bid for airplay approval. Meanwhile, established artists are nervously checking their follower counts on Bebe Cool’s social media, hoping they haven’t inadvertently liked a rival’s post.

Ziza Bafana, ever the thoughtful observer, pondered the broader impact. “If one person controls the music,” he mused aloud while watering his prize-winning sukuma wiki, “does that mean my next hit will only be heard if Bebe Cool needs some background music for his goat-roasting sessions?”

The music community now holds its breath, waiting to see if others will dare to challenge the self-appointed gatekeeper of Ugandan sound. Will there be a rebellion of the airwaves? A playlist putsch? Or will artists simply start writing songs exclusively about Bebe Cool in a desperate attempt to curry favour? Only time, and perhaps Bebe Cool’s personal veto list, will tell.